Words of Wisdom: Guests Share Advice to Their Pre-Life Shift Selves

I'm Matt Gilhooley and this is the Life Shift Candid conversations about the pivotal moments that have changed lives forever. Hello, my friends, I'm Matt Gilhooley and I am the host of the Life Shift podcast. And I am the lucky one. I.

I am the person that gets the opportunity to speak to all these amazing guests. And I'm forever humbled that everyone that's been on the show has trusted me with their story. And a lot of these stories are deeply personal.

A lot of them are tragic or have tragic moments in them.

And I think, you know what I love about the Life Shift podcast is sure, some of these events are really hard to hear and experience, but I do find that every episode ends in some kind of inspirational way of hope and what we've learned as humans through the experiences that we go through.

If you are a regular listener of the Life Shift podcast or if you've never listened, what I like to do at the end of the story is kind of ask my guests if they could go back to that person right before their Life Shift moment, what would they say?

And for some people, I ask for advice for people that are going through something similar or and sometimes I ask just a random question that's in the similar vein.

And so this is one way that I get to hear what someone would say to that person, knowing full well it's not possible with the intention of anyone listening that might be going through something similar or a similar experience, they have the opportunity to hear maybe some inspirational words or something that resonates with them so that they feel a little bit less alone in their experiences. I just want to say thank you to those of you that have been listening. So I hope you leave this episode feeling inspired.

So thank you and I hope you enjoy listening to this recap episode of the responses to if you could go back to that person right before your Life Shift moment, what would you say?

I think I'd sit down and have a beer with him and probably make a few jokes. But I would tell them, just have faith in yourself. Keep moving forward. Keep moving forward.

Keep, keep believing there is a meaning to all this madness. And whatever you're searching for will find you. You're not going to find it. It will find you. Just believe it. And that's about all I could say.

And here, have another drink.

I'm getting a little teary eyed thinking about it. I think what I would tell her because I'm envisioning myself just slumped over the desk.

I think the word like congratulations is just coming up for me, like, good for you for just letting it out, saying the words, putting it out there, you know, it's. I didn't know what was going to come next.

And to know now, you know what I've accomplished and the life that my husband and I and our daughter continue to build, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

God, that is such a great question. I think I would tell him to just enjoy it and be who you are in the moment.

Don't let your guard or don't put up those walls because of what you've heard. Because that was the moment that I stopped, for lack of a better term, judging people harshly. Because I'm like, oh, I've heard so many things from.

And you hear, like, gossip all the time. And that creates this image of someone that you've never met before. And you go into it with that precognition.

And that was the moment that I was like, oh, I'm wrong often. And people are wrong often. And you should. And regardless of who that person is to other people, you should still have compassion and.

And love that person. So be who you normally are.

Yeah, I wanna. I wanna. Yeah. Comfort her. Poor you, you know? Poor you. You believed your thoughts and, you know, you.

Because I was going in my mind about, oh, my God, you see, I'm not good at anything. Oh, my God, you see, I'm a bad mother. Oh, my God, you see, I cannot do anything. Oh, my God, I'm a terrible person. I don't know what I said.

It was so horrible. You see, I'm so spoiled. It was. Yeah. And I. I just wished for her. Yeah. Need a hug. You poor girl.

This is. Yeah. It's so many things, like, look, all part of a bigger, bigger story. This is a moment in time. The story is not over.

Don't lose your faith and shorten the field, which is something that I did that in terms of just, like, just, just. Just take things day by day, keep your circle tight in terms of the people that you'll confide in and you truly trust.

If you're blessed to have family, go to your family, then widen that a little bit with some friends that you truly, truly trust. Find a good church that you could get plugged into. He could find, you know, a. You know, what. Whatever that is. Like someone.

A leader, a pastor, a priest, whatever that is. Like, I did that. And. And I'm glad I did. And I would say that to this same Bryant back then.

You have no idea, like, how close, like, the the brighter days are closer than what you might realize right now because you kill, you only see darkness.

I would probably just continue to say, like, it's going to be okay. I know you can't see it right now, but you need to trust the process. Every body is different. Everyone heals differently.

Everyone reacts to everything differently. That's the issue with medicine, right? No one can give you a definitive answer because no two people are alike.

So what I think I would just tell her is, you got this. You are stronger than you ever, ever could have imagined. People look up to you.

My own mother, I can't tell you the amount of times that she made me cry because she just kept saying, like, you are my idol right now. I can never go through what you went through or what you're going through. And I would just tell her, like, you're strong. You're a strong ass woman.

You got this girlfriend, like, just keep going because it's gonna get better. You're going to live out your dream that you never even knew you had.

I honestly, I think if I'd really known how bad it was going to be, I'm not sure I would have started. But I. So I would say I maybe would be okay.

But I guess, I guess I'd be grateful that I wouldn't tell him anything because I think it'd be, it'd be like, almost like if you knew what you're getting into, you never would have gone. Like, almost like if you go on a hike and like you're halfway up and. And you're like, I'm so.

I never would have started this hike if I'd known how long it was. But now that I'm halfway through, like, I can't turn around now. So that would, that would be lame. So I guess you wouldn't say anything.

Yeah, I guess I would maybe give him a hug instead. A hug would be much more valuable than any sort of like, advice.

I would have said, you are not a burden. You are very loved and your family needs you. They need you here, not six feet under.

Slow down and trust yourself and take care of yourself. Because one of the things I've lived my whole life doing is. Well, it turned out I was doing it for selfish reasons.

I thought I was showing up in a way to help other people solve their problems, make them feel good. And I just ended up hurting them and myself along the way. And it's because it's so weird, like choosing ourselves or me choosing myself.

You know, there's people like, oh, that's narcissistic. Oh, that's selfish. It's like, you know, it could be.

And there's also another way to do it where nobody, like, nobody learns by you telling them what to do. Everybody learns by either reading or seeing or observing or experiencing and then making their own choice.

And if they can see you doing that for you, eating right, exercising, taking a pause, saying no, doing whatever it is for you, that's where that permission comes in. And it's like, that's the best way to influence somebody else.

Who.

The first thing that popped into my head, which seems. But now it's there and I can't get it out, is you matter. Your life matters to other people. And that's.

I think, the message that I would want to give anybody who's feeling that way is there's. There is something else. There is another way to live there.

If.

If this isn't what you want, there will be another way. And you will find it. If you stick around, if you leave, you'll never find it. But if you stick around, you may find a better way to live.

And you matter to other people.

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