Unyielding Determination Through Life's Trials | Ashley Mason

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happened on my 19th birthday. We found out that my mom was diagnosed with glioblastoma which is grade 4 brain cancer. And so that diagnosis completely came out of the blue because it was something that she didn't even end up showing symptoms until about a month prior and so it was something that was completely out of the blue, obviously very unexpected, but it was very eye opening to me. And I kind of experienced that firsthand where I was like we only have so much time.

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in our lives and there's only so many opportunities we have. And so if we feel passionate about something and if we feel excited about something, there's no better time to act on it than now. And so shortly after her diagnosis, that's when I really started to put in the work and I was like, I'm going to start my company. I don't care if I'm only 19 or what people think of me. And then I launched Dash of Social eight months later. Today's guest is Ashley Mason. Ashley is the owner of Dash of Social, which is a marketing agency that she launched back in 2016.

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Besides that, she also runs a passion project called the Massachusetts Business Network, which provides support and educational resources to professionals and business owners throughout the state. She's not just a successful entrepreneur, though. She's an avid reader, and you'll hear all about her reading journey, and she's a runner. So she balances a fulfilling personal life with her professional pursuits. Her story is truly one of resilience, determination, and really, really, really the power of chasing one's dream.

01:28
even in the face of adversity. We discuss Ashley's life from her childhood entrepreneurial dreams to the pivotal moment that really drastically changed her perspective and led her to establish her own company. From playing stores in the basement with her sisters to becoming a micro influencer at the age of 16, her entrepreneurial spirit was evident from the very beginning. And she'll share with us how these early experiences shaped her career path and really fueled her to start her own business. Before we jump into the episode,

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I wanted to thank my Patreon supporters. Specifically, I'd like to thank Traci, Emily, and Miki for all supporting two episodes every single month on the Patreon tier. Thank you so much for your support. It helps cover the production costs and any of the software or hardware that I try to use to bring these stories to your ears. So thank you. If you're interested in directly supporting the show, please head to patreon.com/thelifeshiftpodcast, and you can learn all about the different tiers.

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as low as $3 a month. So without further ado, I'd like to introduce you to Ashley Mason. I'm Matt Gilhooly, and this is The Life Shift, candid conversations about the pivotal moments that have changed lives forever.

02:52
Hello, my friends. Welcome to the Life Shift podcast. I am here with Ashley. Hello, Ashley. Hi, Matt. Thank you for having me. Well, thank you for being here. And we've been trying to do this for a few months now, but you decided, no, Matt, I'm gonna make you wait multiple times. Good things come to those who wait. That's what I say. Oh, yeah. That's what it was. No, I mean, I think it's, you know, we have such busy lives in our normal lives, and I appreciate you making the time and finding.

03:21
a time that works for you because I think the story that you're going to share today is something that unfortunately others can relate to. And my whole goal with this show is like, I hope there's someone just like, just one person out there listening to an episode that is feeling alone in their circumstance and they hear someone like you or my story or someone else's story and they're like, Oh, wow, I'm not alone in this. Like someone else has gone through this and has kind of

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moved through, moved with, moved on, whatever that might be. And there's kind of hope that comes with it. So thank you for just being willing to do it. Yeah, thank you for providing the space. It can be scary sometimes to share our personal stories, but I think we were talking before recording, I think sharing our stories publicly in ways like this is so much more impactful, especially like those of us that have experienced like a traumatic event or something that has been

04:19
quite hard in our lives because I think it just adds more layers and more human aspects so that when we do talk about the things that society tells us that we should be talking about, it makes a lot more sense, like how we got there or, you know, like there's just a lot more layers to those stories. And so, you know, absolutely. Thanks again. Yeah, my pleasure. So, yeah, as we as we try to get into this before we do, maybe you can just tell us a little bit without giving away too much.

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of who you are right now in this moment, just to give us a little context of who Ashley is right now in 2024. You got it. So my name is Ashley Mason. I am a marketing agency owner. My company is Dash of Social, which I started back in 2016. I also have a passion project called Massachusetts Business Network, where we provide support and educational resources to career professionals and business owners throughout the state.

05:15
And I'm also a runner and a big reader in my free time. I didn't even mention that. Ashley and I are connected on, I'm just going to call it Twitter, but X, and on Instagram. And I see you post a book a day, pretty much, it seems. Pretty much. I don't know how many books. Yeah, you read so many books. You go to a library. I mean, it's just so inspiring to think with all the things you just listed in your life that you do, you have your own company, you have these side projects, you're running.

05:46
Now in 2024, 10 miles, twice a week, and you're reading, how many books did you read last year? 187. Just a casual number. Yeah. So what is it about book reading, before we get into your story, what is it about book reading that you're so drawn to? Because there's clearly a very strong passion for it, because 187 in 52 weeks is quite a bit.

06:14
I love that question. So I had always been a reader, which I had actually got from my mom. My mom was always a huge reader. And so just seeing her constantly reading new books and having our entire boiler room in our basement just full of boxes of books definitely rubbed off on me. When I started my company and also when I was in school, I kind of like stopped reading as much as I had been just because the fact that it was just hard and I realized that I had to pick and choose which

06:42
tasks or projects I could dedicate my time to and that meant that I had to kind of put reading on the back burner. But fast forward five years after starting Dash for Social, finally after five years of just grinding, I hit an extreme period of burnout where I was just like, something has to change and I almost just like quit working so hard, cold turkey. And I was like, I need to do something to just really set that work-life balance. I realized for me that

07:09
I always need to feel productive. And so that's why I was always pulling up my laptop after work or working on the weekends because I just had this itch to be like, you're just sitting here, do something with your time. And so I realized that if I kind of replaced that urge to work with reading, I still felt productive because reading is good for you and you're learning something in some way. And that's what really kind of helped me to kind of transition out. And of course I just love to read, so I just.

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ended up kind of ramping up the number of books I've read throughout time. But that's what really, really helped me to get clear on making sure that I'm filling up my own cop and taking time for myself and not just working to the grind all the time. Yeah, I love that little secret. It's a secret checklist that you have going though, because you're like, oh, I'm reading. It's great. Everyone look at like, you know, it's reading, but also I'm accomplishing reading this book. Yes, exactly. I love that there's like this, this hidden agenda to satisfy.

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the over-worker, the people pleaser, probably, to just try to be productive all the time. So you found a way to still be productive, but also have some kind of casual time in which you can relax and probably reset your days in a way. So that's kudos to you. Thank you. That's a lot of books. It is.

08:29
It is. Good on you. And I love that it kind of ties probably a little bit into your story and kind of the attachments and the things that we bring along. As listeners may or may not know, I don't want to know a lot about my guests before they come on the show. So I have like a short question on the intake form just to give me kind of some framework of what we're going to talk about.

08:52
And I loved part of what you said, and I don't know if we'll go into it, but part of what you said was there was such a society's checklist for you. And it's so much of what I talked to so many people about is that at some point in our lives, whether that was through our parents or society or whatever, we kind of assumed that life, there were check marks that we had to accomplish by certain points so that we could be successful, quote unquote, successful in some way. And so part of what you said was there.

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we have another event that we'll talk about. So to get us there and to talk around that, maybe you can kind of paint the picture of what your life was like leading up to this pivotal moment that you feel really shows a before and after version of Ashley. You got it. So the pivotal moment actually started with the fact that I've always wanted to be an entrepreneur. So it's really entrepreneurship that came out of the pivotal moment that I'll cover in a bit.

09:45
But for as long as I can remember, I've always had this desire to own a business. Like I always knew that one day, since like an extremely young age, that I would own a business, but I just never quite knew what it would be. One of the stories that I always tell is, I have three sisters, and so I have a twin and two older sisters, and we used to play this game a lot when we were younger called stores. And so basically the four of us would pretend that we each owned a different store. I was always the bank.

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My twin sister was always the pet shop. My other sister was the gym. And my fourth sister was always the clothing store or the boutique. And so we would just pretend that we owned these stores. Our basement would transform into an entire town every weekend. And we would just shop at each other's stores with fake money. And I became obsessed with the game and begged them to play it with me so much that they became sick of it. And they're like, we're not playing this anymore because we're stored out. Like we can't do this.

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And but it was just really that early introduction to entrepreneurship, like probably at age six, that I really, really fell in love with. And I just kind of became obsessed with, I guess, from being honest. And as soon as I could start making money, I did. I vividly remember like using my family's computer at age 10 to Google, like how to make money as a 10 year old. No 10 year old really needs money, but I wanted it. Molly, you could go shopping at your sister's stores. Yes, exactly.

11:10
support local businesses. So I remember feeling frustrated by like the lack of options that were available because of the fact that I was young. I mean, I wasn't old enough to babysit. All I could really do was have a lemonade stand, but I lived in a quiet residential neighborhood and obviously being in Massachusetts, we only have so many months of nice weather a year. So I felt like my hands were tied, but I had ended up really kind of carrying that passion with me. One of the things that I...

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love also love to do, which makes sense now that I own a marketing agency, is I love to write. So that was one of the things that I also had always had in the back of my mind was that one day I really wanted to start a blog that actually ended up happening about 12 years ago in September 2012. I was actually in my sophomore year of high school at the time.

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And that was known to be a really challenging academically year. And I wanted some type of creative outlet to use to kind of like decompress from the sports that I was playing and the school stuff that was going on. And that's when I decided to start a blog. And so one of my I call it like a toxic trait, but I guess it's a good thing is that when I feel excited about something like I fully commit. So I ended up like reading.

12:24
Exactly. And running. So what ended up happening was I just like dove full force into this blog and was probably spending like 10 to 15 hours on it per week, just writing blog posts, connecting with other bloggers and things like that. What age was this? I was like 15 when I started it. So I was young, I was early on in high school. And what was the what was the topic? It was about like basically lifestyle. So it was geared towards high school and college age girls.

12:53
So I talked about like study tips and outfits and just kind of like fun things that high schoolers are looking at. You were writing like real blogs, not like journal entries or like, oh, the woes of a teenager kind of thing. You were writing what a blogger would write that would get traction on their website and find, you know, then using probably SEO techniques and whatnot, so. Yeah.

13:23
Good on you. I can't even imagine as a teenager to have that much drive and passion. So thank you. Yeah, it was something I really enjoyed. And although I enjoyed it and I was spending so much time on it, I was like, if I'm going to spend this much time on it, I need to make sure that more than just my family members and friends are the ones reading my blog posts, which is really what was happening. I was getting a lot of support from my family and friends, which is awesome, but they weren't my target market. And I knew that. And so I said to myself, how

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can I get seen in front of the right audience, which was high schoolers and college students. And that's when I realized that social media was the answer from there. So this was probably like 2013 at this point, and Instagram was brand new, probably two years old at that point. And so I started teaching myself how to build my blog through social media. I taught myself how to use social media from a business standpoint.

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And it ended up growing my blog a lot, which led me to become like a micro influencer. So I got like my first influencer deal when I was probably 16 years old. And it was a lot of fun. I did a lot of fun things. I would attend press events. I can't relate to any of this because I'm old and we didn't even, we barely had the internet when I was in that, we were like, Oh wow, I can type and like search certain websites, but good for you. That's like.

14:41
I think it's a whole new world for people. I mean, I'm not that old. I'm only early 40s. But the way that technology changed in those periods of time and how quickly it did, even in the last five years, you know as a marketing agency, it's like every day, you've got to find something new to learn so that you can keep up with everything. And so it's so fascinating for people like me to hear, oh, you were 15, 16, and here you are getting deals from outside places.

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because you had the wherewithal to teach yourself how to do something. Yeah. Your parents must be proud. Thank you so much. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. And I was getting all of these different influencer opportunities, but I realized that a lot of the small businesses I was working with barely had a social media presence, if any presence at all. And so I had thought to myself, there's a huge missed opportunity here because I experienced myself how much social media can really impact your brand and help grow it.

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And all of these companies are just kind of leaving money at the table by not putting in some time and effort into their social media presence. And so through the own work that I was doing, I started to feel passionate about social media and marketing. I wanted to dip my toes in the water further. So I had started offering pro bono services to the companies that I already had relationships with so that way I could support them, but then also familiarize myself with marketing because obviously I didn't feel like I could just charge right off the bat.

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And so I ended up really enjoying that and got my first official freelance paid gig my senior year of high school when I was about 17. So I was yeah, I was like obsessed, of course. So I was like, I want to do more of this. Yeah, good on you, though. I mean, that's in itself. I wish that all of us had something that we could find that we were so passionate about. I feel like it took me 40 years to find this podcast.

16:35
And now I can understand what you mean about like, I got to learn all the different things so that I can be better. Like before we record, you're like, I like your setup. And I'm like, it took a while to get here because I had to learn all these things. So I can kind of relate in that way. Absolutely. You're making it happen by the time you were, you know, you weren't even out of high school yet. Yeah, pretty much. So I had gotten my freelance gig in high school. And that's when I had that aha moment where I was like, I know a business I want to own one day and I want to own a marketing agency.

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but we kind of have like these predetermined steps or tasks that we need to kind of cross off that society expects of us. And so for me, I felt like I had to go through the like traditional route of graduating high school, going to college, getting my degree, building a successful 20 plus year career, and then I can start a business. I didn't think it was normalized to start a business right off the bat. So I kind of thought that was the path that I had to take.

17:34
But now my pivotal moment comes in, in my life shift, where during my freshman year of college, it actually happened on my 19th birthday, we found out that my mom was diagnosed with glioblastoma, which is grade four brain cancer. And so that diagnosis completely came out of the blue because it was something that she didn't even end up showing symptoms until about a month prior. And so it was something that was completely out of the blue, obviously very unexpected.

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but it was very eye-opening to me. And I kind of experienced that firsthand where I was like, we only have so much time in our lives and there's only so many opportunities we have. And so if we feel passionate about something and if we feel excited about something, there's no better time to act on it than now. And so shortly after her diagnosis, that's when I really started to put in the work. And I was like, I'm gonna start my company. I don't care if I'm only 19 or what people think of me. And then I launched Dash A Social eight months later.

18:31
Wow, naturally, my thoughts are around this diagnosis of your mother and how that can affect someone that is 19 years old, trying to start your life, but also, you're trying to be a college student, I'm assuming, at the time. You're trying to do the normal, quote unquote, normal college things, right? And just be that person. But now you have this life-altering event that not only is gonna

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is altering the way that your mother can proceed through her life, but also how do you navigate that? Did you have a period of like, nothing matters anymore, I need to heal, I need to grieve, or did you like ignore and like head first into this thing? Because I think that's also a coping mechanism that we use as well. Did you have either path or?

19:26
What did that look like? How did that affect your day to day? Yeah, I would say it was a mix of both. So my mom and I were extremely close. So of course that was devastating as it would be for anyone to hear of news like that and try to process it. But just like you mentioned, I know that my coping mechanism for grief is just work. Just head down. If I'm so busy that I don't have to think about it, then I'll be okay. And of course that's obviously what led to my overworking and my burnout five years later.

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But that's really how I got through things, was if I physically do not give myself time to think about it, I won't think about it. Does there come a time in which you have to think about it? Or has that not, I mean, that might not even have happened yet in a way that sometimes we as humans kind of push it down far enough that it hasn't bubbled up. Did you have any moments in which this kind of exploded on you? Because I think it...

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it's healthy to love something so much, to do something so hard and really have this passion, but it also can serve us negatively in some ways too, right? Because the longer, I know this firsthand, my mom died when I was eight, and for eight years, I did not, like I did not grieve in any capacity. And so it just bottled up for eight years. And when I was about 16, I was forced to write an assignment. I wasn't forced, but.

20:50
I had to write a narrative assignment in my English class, and I wrote about the time period around my mom dying, and it was the first time I cracked. And like, I was a mess for a short period after that. So I'm curious if you've had those moments in which whatever you pushed down came out, because I think it's important for people to hear. Yes, I think definitely. So what I found during the day to day while she was sick and while she was here is that I kind of just like,

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put my head down and just try to get through the day. I had so many things I need to do that I was like, I almost didn't think about it, I just did it. But I would find that when I actually had those quiet moments at night, late at night, when I'm finally shutting my laptop and it's like, you're like, finally, like let that breath deflate and then everything just kind of settles in and you're like, wow, this is what I'm going through. And especially seeing the physical changes that come when someone's going through cancer or any type of.

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illness, I mean, I was like, this is not the mom that I remember. The mom that's like stand so close to my mind is just seeing someone becomes so frail and someone who needs to someone who is so independent now needs to be 100% dependent on someone. And so that is really what like, set in for me, I'd say. Did you because you have three siblings? Did you find comfort in talking with them? Or are they different from you? Are they?

22:16
Do they process things in a different way? Because I don't understand the sibling dynamic because I'm an only child. So I didn't have anyone that I could use, I guess for a lack of a better word, to kind of go through, because you're all going through the same thing. You have the same mother figure, but you might see it differently. Did you interact with your siblings in a way that was healthy and helpful to you guys? Yeah, so I would say we all definitely had our own experiences with it. I would say probably my twin sister.

22:45
We really had like the closest interaction about it and coincidentally, she's a nurse, she's an RN. So when she was, when we were both in college at the same time and she was going to nursing school, it was really helpful to be able to chat with her about like symptoms that my mom might be having. Like, what does this mean? And it was so incredibly beneficial to have that experience with her because of the fact that she was actually like three hours away at college. So I know that she had a different experience not physically being there.

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unless it was week and she came home or breaks. But I would say we all experience it differently. My best friend actually lost her mom to cancer when we were 16. So she's always been someone who gets it, is what I say. And we had always had close conversations about that. And it was incredibly beneficial to know that I had someone who was so close to me in my life who could get it. Because of course I had, I mean, I'm sure you understand this.

23:41
You have people in your life who are there for you, but if they don't experience it firsthand, sometimes it can be difficult to know what to say. And so it was nice to know that I had someone who could say the right things at the right time and who didn't know exactly what I was going through and how I was feeling. Did you feel comfortable talking to, like bringing it up? Because I feel like I didn't, like I just felt like I couldn't because people would think that I was not doing well.

24:07
And I wasn't, but I also was afraid to disappoint people because I think I also assume this, if people see me happy, then that will eventually equal success and everything's fine, right? And so did you feel comfortable bringing up those emotions as a teenager, I guess, essentially, a young adult? Yeah, I talked about it a lot, especially starting my business. I was very upfront about the fact like...

24:33
This is why I started my business. I was of course very honest and transparent with my clients of like, I have a terminally ill mother that I take care of. And I had to, or I wanted to really be transparent about that because when it came time to her passing away, the clients were in the know about that. And so it was one thing that I always shared on social media and it actually really helped me to build a community. Like there was still to this day, five and a half years later after she passed away, still to this day, people say to me,

25:03
I used to love seeing all your posts about your mom and how close you were and everything you did together and how she inspired you to start your business. And it shows that as we were talking about earlier, the stories that you share make an impact on someone and they make a difference. And so I felt like that was helpful for me to just openly talk about her and how much she meant to me. No, I think that is why people work with certain people because they understand their why, they understand that they're a human. I mean,

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they might choose you over someone that promises them, you know, X, Y, Z exposure and their marketing agency when you're like, look, realistically, this is what we might be able to get. But also, here's who I am as a human and here's what I'm willing to do for you. I think you know this and when you're helping people with their marketing materials, it's it's the story. It's the why it's the it's not the flashy, you know, the Instagram posts that you just made. It's like

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you know, the meat of it. And I think that's so, I'm glad to hear that you did that because I think it is so important and for so long, I was like, I wish I had started sharing it sooner. I can't imagine what kind of healing that gave you as well to know that there was a community of people out there that also cared about you. They didn't know you, but they cared about you. Exactly. They were supporting you and, you know, and moving through this very difficult. I mean, I had...

26:28
I don't know how to use the word, but I had the pleasure of, when my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer, I had the pleasure of intentionally moving through that process with her in a sense that I got to do all the things, say all the things. I spent the last 96 hours of her life with her because I didn't get to do that with my mom. And I shared that whole journey with people because I knew that there was someone out there that just wasn't ready to share it.

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and they felt like there was a community. So, you know, I think that's wonderful of you. And I'm sure it helped you in some way as well, like in some kind of healing, like let me at least let this out what's happening. Did you find that? It did. And also pairing with that, I was in a sense her primary caretaker. My two older sisters were working full-time and had apartments. My dad was working full-time and my twin sister, as I mentioned, was three hours away at school. And so...

27:25
we were incredibly blessed to have so many family friends and family members who would come each day of the week and just sit and spend time with my mom and visit, but she did have a stroke that left her in a wheelchair, so it required a lot of physical labor and physical work that we just didn't want to put on someone else. And so...

27:45
While my dad was at work and in between me going to classes in college and working, I took care of her and that was everything from getting her out of bed to helping her in the bathroom, dressing her, some days even having to physically pick her up and carry her down the stairs because she just couldn't do it herself, giving her medicine, feeding her like everything. And so I think the fact that I took care of her in that sense and ultimately...

28:11
did for her what she did for me when I was growing up and showing the love that a mother gives to a child. I think that was huge in my healing and closure process because I know that I gave everything that I could to help her in that sense. Yeah, and so much more than she probably would have ever asked for. Like, you know, I feel like parents are so selfless in that way and it's just like, what an honor that you have those memories now. I know they're not.

28:39
positive memories in a way that like you don't want to remember her in that way. Right. But also you got to do, you got to show your love in more than just a card or more than, you know, just the way that so many of us are conditioned to do. And so I'm sorry that you had to go through that, but I'm happy that you got to go through that with her, you know, in a way. And I hope that doesn't sound offensive. No, not at all. I fully agree. I think as Americans, we...

29:08
I think we're conditioned to like shy away from these things, right? I think they're, because we're afraid of our emotions, we're afraid of what they're going to do to us and to hear someone so young as you were to give such a big portion of your life to help someone in need that was your mother. I think it's really inspiring and I hope more people choose to do that. Even though it's like the hardest thing you'll probably ever have to do.

29:38
Yeah, I agree. I agree. And so many people have had said to me, they're like, how do you do what you do? Because that's one of the things that I always share when talking about the story is that like, I used to joke, I didn't know what it meant to be bored, because literally every single waking moment I was spent doing something. And so 4am to midnight every day, my day was just packed. And so they're like, how do you do it? And I'm like, it's because I don't think about it. I just do it. I had to push.

30:04
my own feelings and thoughts aside so that I could be there for my mom in that sense. And it's like I didn't have the time to, I couldn't afford to have the time to like think about stuff and let these emotions drive me down. I had to kind of put on my big girl pants and keep moving forward. Yeah. Did she get to see you like launch this business and be, start to find success in this business? Was she around for, for some of that? She was. So she was around for

30:33
two and a half years. So that would have been June 2018 is when she passed away. And so there's actually, I think it's still the pin post on my Facebook page for my business, but there's a post of her sitting in her wheelchair and she's holding up a printed piece of paper and it's my LLC for Dash Social. And it was like one of the most amazing moments. She was always known for her smile. She had a giant smile and was always smiling. And so she just had what we call the classic Terry smile because her name was Terry.

31:01
She just has the classic Terry smile. That's a very New England name. It is. Mary Theresa, very Irish Catholic Dorchester name. So she had her giant Terry smile on holding this paper. And you can just see how proud she was. And so that was something that always guided me through the difficult days where it's like, I just know I always have her. I know that she's always been supporting me.

31:26
Did you ever have the conversation with her or your parents in general about this society's checklist and how you felt that you had to do certain things but now know like because of this I now realize that I need to do the things that I want to do, not what I think other people expect me to do? Did you ever get to have those kind of conversations? Yeah, so not with my mom because I would say that when she did have her stroke, which is about a year after her diagnosis, it made it difficult to speak and it made it difficult to have conversations. So.

31:55
she understood everything you were saying, she just couldn't really communicate back. So I had a lot of conversations with my dad and my dad is incredible. I couldn't have asked for a better dad during this time. And I always say I feel extremely lucky because if any other 19 year old were to go to their parents and say, I wanna start a business, they probably would say, well, maybe you just like get a full-time job first and then like see how that works out. Like my dad was always just like,

32:24
Okay, like if anyone can do it, I know it's you. And so that was one thing that I experienced too is that when I was in college, in addition to like going to school and having my business, I also had babysat and worked at a coffee shop. And so it got to the point where, I know, I just clearly fill my schedule, but it got to the point where we really did need someone to physically take care of my mom. My dad was like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. And I'm like, well, why don't I just quit the coffee shop?

32:52
and I can just help out with mom. I'm like, I have my business, I have babysitting, like, I'll be fine. And he's like, okay. So it's like, he just didn't really say like, that's not a good idea or what have you. He's always been extremely supportive. And I feel like that's what helped me to get to where I am too, is knowing that the people who love me and mean the most to me were always, always, always in my corner and never once doubted my capabilities. Well, I would imagine too,

33:22
the version of Ashley growing up that was always head first into everything that she was passionate about. And I think if you've proved yourself along the way, I think it makes it easier, right, for parents to be like, she's going to do this. Like, even if I say no, she's probably still going to do it. And so, you know, I think it's, it's great that you have that support. You're right. I think a lot of parents would not say no, because they didn't believe in their child, but no, because they were fearful.

33:51
of the world, right? They were fearful of how their child would move through the world if they didn't do what was expected of them. And yeah, you're right. You're lucky to have a parent that, or parents that wanted you to do this and were like, hey, make it happen and here you are. Exactly. You've made it happen. Yeah, and I think that starting it in college too was helpful because I mean, like it's.

34:15
I kind of viewed it as like a playground ultimately where it's like I didn't really have bills in college or anything like that. It's like it could be my trial period where if Dash of Social hadn't worked out, then I could just graduate and get a full-time job. Like, that's no big deal compared to someone perhaps starting it after college and it's like, okay, well now you have student loans to pay and you might have rent or stuff for your car. I was grateful. I know I'm privileged in that sense, but I'm grateful for the fact that I had a roof over my head that I didn't have to pay for and I had.

34:44
food that I didn't have to pay for because my parents always kept the house well stocked and everything like that. And so just knowing that I didn't have those worries, I think made it much easier for me because it didn't have as much pressure riding on me. Of course I put a lot of pressure on myself because I wanted to succeed, but it made it easier knowing that if it didn't work out, it'd be okay, because I could just move forward. But I think it also helps that you loved it so much. I think that your passion for it was so much. I was wondering like,

35:13
when your mother received the diagnosis, was that like something like you had already started and it was like hyperdrive, this is going to happen? Or how did that diagnosis really push you over the edge to like a different version of you? Yeah, so it had always been in the back of my mind, or not always, but once I started the blog, it had been in the back of my mind. And then once you receive that diagnosis, that's when I kind of started thinking like, okay, I think this is something I want to do.

35:42
and I'm just gonna go for it. And that's why it took me eight months in between January 2016, just when she was diagnosed, to September 2016 with starting it because I spent so much of that time researching. Because again, me being type A and a perfectionist, I was like, I just can't launch something without knowing what I'm doing. So I spent so much time.

36:03
researching, thinking about my business name, like thinking about the services I wanted to offer, my own marketing strategy. And once I finally felt like things were ready, that's kind of when I went live and when I really took off with things. But I'd say it was more of like a gradual process because I had said to myself, I wanna do this, but I wanna do it right. And so if I'm gonna launch something like this and commit to it, I need to make sure that I'm setting myself up for success to make that happen.

36:30
I have two questions and I'm not sure which way to go because I think it's gonna take us in a different direction. But like part of me wonders when your mother passed, did things change for you in the way that you operated because now it was like, okay, well, this is a chapter that's kind of ending in a way. But I also am curious, what do you think you would have launched it had your mother not received the diagnosis? Do you think like, you know, and clearly we're going in two different directions. So whichever direction you would like to go,

37:00
I'm curious to that if you've thought about either of those moments. I have thought about them. And it's funny that you mentioned it. So talking first about if she hadn't received the diagnosis, if I'd still launch, I think I would still have a marketing agency, but I don't think I would have started it at the age that I did, or I don't think I would have had the accomplishments that I've had since that time. Like, I think the fact that I started it so young has helped me to achieve.

37:27
certain things that I don't think I would have had the same opportunity to do had I been a little bit older. So I would say that's the answer to that question. But your other question about like how things change when she passed, I remember so she passed on a Tuesday night, we had the wake Friday, funeral Saturday, and then that Monday I was back to work. And because I just didn't want to sit and think. But I remember sitting at my desk that Monday morning and all of a sudden it's just like tears. Because

37:56
I realized I suddenly had so much time on my hands and I did not know what to do with all of that time because all of my time had been spent at school during that time. She passed in June, so I was out of school, but in school, taking care of her, working on the business, I was constantly going from one thing to the next and all of a sudden I had all this time that I was not used to and that heavily sat in for me and that's what really pushed me into my coping mechanism of just...

38:24
Working non-stop because again, I just didn't want to have that empty space or that empty time Yeah, because it would force you to process things that maybe you just weren't ready to I mean Yeah after is not really the easiest time to to process a loss that large and so I get it I think that you're coping mechanism of diving into work and just being so busy that You're so busy until you're so tired that

38:53
there is no time in between for you to really take care of yourself in an emotional way, I would imagine. How long did that period of like overdrive last for until you have this sense of like, I'm going to burn out or I am burnt out? Yeah, it was five years since I started. So I started my company September 2016 and it was August 2021 where I finally was like, something needs to change. And what actually was that pivotal moment, my second pivotal moment was

39:22
I was supposed to go away with my then boyfriend, now fiance's family down to the Cape, Cape Cod for a week long vacation. And it was the night before we were leaving, I guess it actually ended up being the day of that we were leaving, I was up till 3.30 in the morning finishing work. And it's not that I was poorly managing my time or that I just like wasn't being efficient or effective. It's the fact that I just overloaded my plate so much.

39:50
that I felt like I had to stay up till 3.30 in the morning to get everything done before I felt like I could take time off. And at that point, of course, it was also through the pandemic, I was very grateful that my business performed really well during the pandemic with many businesses needing to go online. And because of that, I accepted every single project my way because I saw firsthand the businesses that had the complete opposite situation as me, where they were shutting down or they couldn't, they couldn't keep their businesses running.

40:20
And so I would have felt so guilty if I were to complain about being busy when there was people who would do anything to be busy. And so that was a really big challenge for me. And it was just when I ended up realizing I was working extremely long hours every day to work, but it was finally that 3.30 a.m. moment where I was like, this is ridiculous. I don't need to keep doing this to myself. And I was like, when I get back from this vacation, things are gonna change and that's exactly what happened. My first day back to work,

40:50
Like I mentioned earlier, like cold turkey just kind of quit the overwork and was just ready to focus on myself.

40:57
How did you do that? How did you quit? Because I mean, if you have a lot of clients and you have all this, how did you, if another entrepreneur is listening, how do you get out of that overdrive? Yeah, and I think what it all came down to was just finally delegating more to the incredibly talented team that I had built. I had a team, that's the issue is that I had a team, but all these things would come my way and I'd say, oh, well, I can do it, that'll take five minutes, oh, I can do it, that's no problem.

41:24
Next thing you know, it's like a hundred five minute tasks later. I'm like, now it's not just five minutes. So I think it all came down to the fact that I needed to stop feeling like I needed to do everything myself. And it was okay to rely on my team because that's what they were here for. And so it really just kind of forced me to get into the mindset of what do I need to delegate next? What are the things that I absolutely have to do myself? What are the things that my team is able to handle for me? And so it really kind of forced me.

41:53
to be mindful of that and make sure that I wasn't saying yes to everything. But that kind of really allowed me to take that step back. And then I finally realized, Oh, delegating is what allows me to work normal business hours. Yeah. It that's, I mean, I think that's the downfall of loving what you do so much too. I think because you're like, I just like to do it, you know, like I'm just going to keep in then. And eventually the pile gets larger and larger and you're like,

42:22
Again, like you said, oh, that'll take me five minutes. I can do that. Plus, I love doing that. I'm really good at that, you know, whatever it may be. And then you're just like, you love it so much that it's not like you hate it that you're waiting, that you're working till three o'clock in the morning, but you also hate it because you're working till three o'clock in the morning. Exactly, exactly. Yeah, I can, I mean, I guess, I don't think I would work on the podcast. The smallest thing that I can relate to doing this podcast is early on I would take.

42:50
as many people that wanted to record at once. And sometimes I was recording like four episodes a week, which some conversations are really deep and heavy. And as a natural empath, it's like you absorb a lot of that and it's just not healthy. And so I can kind of relate in the sense that, you know, you're doing fun stuff maybe, and part of your stuff is fun and part of it's probably not very fun, very business-like and things you don't love to do. But...

43:16
staying up till 3.30, we're like, okay, I'm supposed to be on vacation in three hours, in four hours to head to the Cape for a week. And here I am working so that to earn my vacation of some sort, I'm sure that was part of that. It was for sure. Do you think that someone that is in this entrepreneurial space that's facing all these other things in real world, I guess, in family life or facing something hard like this,

43:45
Do you think that the way that you approached it would be the way that you would approach it if you knew now what you, like would you face your mom's diagnosis and eventual passing in the same way, knowing what you know now? I would say, yeah, a mix of yes and no. I think her diagnosis gave me a totally new perspective on life and I'm grateful for that because things that used to bother me, now I think about them and I'm like,

44:13
it could be so much worse. Like that's not even a problem. Like once you go through something big, you just get put into perspective. And so I appreciate that. But I also wish what I did differently was I wish I really put in those self-care moments for myself and I did not. And I'm a believer that like no one should feel like they have to hustle indefinitely for the rest of their life. But I do believe that to be successful, you do have to hustle a little bit. Like I don't think I would have been as successful if I...

44:42
was more lax about it. Like I think the overworking and the non-stop stuff did lead me to where I am today, but I did wish that I was more intentional about holding space for myself and setting time for myself because like I mentioned, I gave up reading but I was still running every day, but that was really all that I did and I'm running on little to no sleep. So I just wish I took care of myself first because I think if I had an energy reserve, I don't think I would have burnt out.

45:11
when I did, I would think it would have been better about that. Yeah, but at the same time, maybe that burnout was really helpful in a way too, because if you were just gradually like, you know, steady state, but it was still too much, maybe you wouldn't have hit that moment in which you were like, no way, I need to adjust life, because as you as your mom's diagnosis kind of triggered to you is that life is short. Yeah. You know, and it can't spend the whole time working, right? So I'm assuming that

45:40
Now, even though you're reading 187 books a year and hitting that checklist, you're still taking some downtime for yourself for things that are, I mean, I would imagine that a good percentage of those are fiction books, right? That you can escape into something that's not, like, let me learn how to do SEO kind of thing. Exactly, that's my one non-negotiable with reading is that I genuinely don't wanna read about...

46:05
business. Like I love business. I love everything about entrepreneurship. But that's what I always say is like, I read to relax. If I'm reading about business, that's not relaxing. That's working. Yeah. What is your go to kind of read thrillers? I love thrillers because I think they're page turners and it's really easy to get like so engaged and invested in the storyline. And I think it's the fact that they're also

46:31
most of the time unpredictable. Like I do love romance novels too, but you can tell first page in like what's going to happen. Like you just know how it's going to end. You know that they're going to go through some difficulty and then they're going to be okay at the end. But with thrillers, it's like you don't really know how it's going to play out. And I think that suspense and that unknown is what really draws me in. I think there's a lot of people that can relate to the way that you approach productivity and your life and things in that way.

47:01
And I love that you've kind of like tricked yourself into this like task accomplishment through something that you love to do that is also fairly relaxing, escapism, something that is physical in a way that you can flip the pages and so it feels productive, but also it's very important for your recovery. I think that that was tricky.

47:27
And I don't know if you did it consciously or subconsciously, but I love that that's what you found. And then you're running. I don't know how you do 10 miles twice a week. Yeah, you're right. Those two things, I feel like those are my non-negotiables now. I mean, I might not be able to get to read every day. Do you read while running? I read while walking. If I read while running, I feel like I can't concentrate. But if I'm walking, I can concentrate on the words. OK. So I'm wondering if.

47:57
I like to kind of wrap up these conversations with a question that's impossible to answer. But I'm wondering which version of Ashley I would want to ask this question based on what you know now. If you could go back to the Ashley that had her bank store in the basement, knowing all the things that you've experienced now through

48:21
successful entrepreneurial ventures through influencer kind of moments in your teenage years through facing this hardship with your mother and the diagnosis and eventual passing of her. Is there anything that you would want to tell that little version of Ashley about this journey she was about to embark on? Yeah, I would say to stick to her gut because there are many things that I held back myself back from doing or did even though I didn't want to do them because of the fact that again, I felt like I had to.

48:50
And I feel like as people, but especially as women, especially, I feel like we're very intuitive and we talk ourselves out of trusting that feeling. And we try to say like, no, that's like not right. We're overthinking it. But nine times out of 10, I find that my gut is right. And so I wish I had listened to that earlier, whether it's about like.

49:13
business projects I didn't want to take on or again, starting my company when I did. That's the one gut feeling that I listened to, but I feel like I wish I started doing that earlier until it got to the point where I was like, I need to just follow what I want to do, if that makes sense.

49:29
It does, and I think it's important for anyone, even at any stage in their life at this point, is that life is really short if we think about it. Why should we spend so much time doing things we don't wanna do or doing things we think other people want us to do? Just live your life and do it the way that you wanna do, and if other people don't like it, it's not their life. As long as you're not hurting anyone or hurting yourself.

49:56
I think that it's important to kind of lean into those feelings. I like that. I like, do you think she would have? Yeah. If she heard, if she saw an older version of herself, I think she probably would have listened. I agree. I feel like younger me, if she were to look at me now, she'd be like, I did not expect that to happen. I feel like there'd be a lot of awe, which I think is really gratifying to think of. Really? Yeah. That's good.

50:21
You don't think that you didn't have dreams of, I mean, it sounds like you had dreams of running that. You don't think she would believe where you are now? I think so, but I don't think at the age that I am. So I started Dasha Social at 19, but now I'm 27 and I feel like she would, she'd probably be like, 19 year old, you started that? Yeah. No, it's super impressive. And I think I was, I was part of that, that crowd that really believe that you do have to.

50:50
go to college, then you have to get the job, then you have to work the full, and then you can find the things that you like to do. Yeah. I think we, so, you know, good on you for starting that at 19, good on you for continuing and loving it so much and finding this passion. I think you're one of the lucky ones. I don't think that there are so many people that find the passion that they're able to make a career out of and make something from it. So, super impressed by your dedication to the things that you love to do, and I'm happy that you found it.

51:20
I mean, I think that's big. Me too. Thank you so much. If people want to learn more about your company or just follow you or just maybe they have a story that's very similar and they just want to share it with you, is there a best way to get in your orbit? Absolutely. My website is dashofsocial.com and my handle is dashofsocial on.

51:42
Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter. You can also find me personally on LinkedIn, Ashley Mason, and I'm very active on Twitter under my personal brand account, which is how Matt and I met, which is at Ash Jean Mason. Awesome, we will include all those easy links in the show notes so people can, they don't have to jot it down while they're listening, but they can easily click on it and connect with you. Highly recommend that you get into Ashley's.

52:08
orbit and see what she's putting out there, even if you're not searching for a marketing agency or anything like that. I think it's important that we hear each other's stories and we connect with other humans that are doing really cool things. So I appreciate you. Thank you for sharing this hard story, but also how the pieces of your life have affected you and how you've made these changes to make you the version that you are today. Absolutely. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity.

52:37
Of course, that's why I'm here. That's why the life shift exists. We hope that someone listening today hears your story and is like, oh, thought I was alone in the circumstance and now I feel hope that I can move through this, whether that's through burnout at work or overload or facing like a diagnosis in their life. And so thank you again for that. Thank you guys for listening.

53:01
If you enjoyed this episode or you think you know someone that might need to hear this episode, I'd love it if you share this episode with a friend or share it with someone or you like the show, share it with someone, do ratings, reviews. All those fun things are great and are helpful for me as an indie podcaster doing this all myself. So any kind of help is appreciated. And with that, I will be back next week with a brand new episode of the Life Shift Podcast. Thanks again, Ashley. Thanks, Matt.